we’re really gonna go back to ‘women should just choose to not date men and call that lesbianism!’ again huh
we’re gonna do part 2 of this? in 2018???
it’s such an insult to bi women AND lesbians to just dismiss how fucking hard it is to love women. and it’s an insult to bi women and straight women to act like we’re dumb or less woke for potentially loving men as if we had a choice in the matter.
and, yeah, i am defending straight women here. like… it’s not funny or just pitiable that every time they develop feelings for men and act on them they risk severe violence (physical or otherwise) from their oppressors. the idea that one of the most pure feelings in the world (love) is an inherent risk for women of all sexualities isn’t like… funny or a race to prove how your love is more work. loving men? is a huge fucking risk when it comes to things like domestic violence, being forced to take on domestic labor, and just about all the other shit that comes with being with men. loving women? is a huge fucking risk when it comes to homophobic violence and other forms of discrimination.
women’s attraction, desire, and behaviour is framed as a lose-lose-lose situation and to act like we can just “choose” a better option is fucking insulting. there’s really no better term for it–it’s just insulting.
“Well, women can just choose to not date at all if they aren’t attracted to women!” The idea that women must live lives without romantic love because being with men is such a risk isn’t like… something we should celebrate or act like it’s an easy task. It isn’t fair to put the onus back on women to “protect themselves” from men instead of putting the onus on men to end patriarchal oppression or at least be decent enough individuals that women can feel safe loving them.
And let’s not forget that women in relationships with other women can also still be ast risk of abuse and violence. Not as high a risk, perhaps, but one still.
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