Tag: lmao

swanqueenfeathers:

a list of bad tim hcs

  • every time Bruce starts lecturing someone, Tim’ll stand slightly behind him and talk over him really loudly in a deeper voice until Bruce is looking like Murder
  • Tim, flashing two 5 dollar bills and a PIzza Hut coupon: “maybe this will convince you”
  • at galas, when Bruce has a pretty lady on his arm, Tim will lean over and whisper “she doesn’t have the range” “What??” “she doesn’t have the range, Bruce.”
  • one time he ate an entire 1lb bag of sour gummi worms in one sitting. he had never wished for death more than during those following hours of complete misery. his stomach was collapsing inwards and his tongue was numb
  • fell asleep at a WE meeting with his eyes open and freaked out half the people in the room. one guy thought he might have died and security was called. Bruce brings it up every time he’s pissed at tim.

batfamilyposts:

Barbara: dumbest scar stories, go!

Cassandra: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.

Stephanie: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.

Dick: see this little scar on my arm? I got that when Damian dug his nails into my arm during a scary movie.

Damian: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.

Jason: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.

Duke: I have a few scars on my arm from crashing my skateboard.

Tim:

Tim: I have emotional scars.

Jason: way to kill the mood.

incorrect-batfamily-quotes:

Bruce: Tim, I really don’t like you telling personal secrets to the Teen Titans.

Tim: Bruce, I didn’t tell ‘em personal stuff.

Bruce: Today at the Justice League meeting everyone knew that I dyed my white hairs black.

Tim: Oh, you mean about you?

It’s just that even in the rare moments that he’s asleep, your son’s mind is going a mile a minute and his mouth goes along with it, Batman.